Good  Morning! 

I don't feel like I have much to say... so lets see where I go. 

I entered the food I ate last week in to a food calculator. My calories were suprisingly consistent, so that was cool. I did notice I was way under on protein, so I am going to try to step it up. I did well with that yesterday. 

I feel pretty good, but I am bummed out that I seem to be stalling. I am thinking about starting a youtube video blog because I find the vlogs I have seen about others on the keto diet to be really inspiring. I just worry because it seems like people can be pretty cruel on youtube and a lot of people seem to troll around there.

The kids made a huge mess upstairs in their rooms yesterday, so that was disappointing.  I did not see it, but when Adam put autumn to bed he said it looked like they spilled a whole gallon of water on the floor.

I made a new design yesterday, maybe I will post it on my other blog... it is a drawing of one of our cats wearing a crown :)

I am feeling a little apathetic today. I would like to feel happier. I guess the best way to do that is to get happy- I strongly believe we create our lives and are in charge of our emotions ( for the most part, of course, I have also suffered from severe depression, etc. so I know how that feels uncontrollable) .

So... lets end this post with five things that make me happy...

1. My awesome, sweet, handsome, wonderful husband
2. My Children (when they are not driving me crazy, lol)
3.  Cats. I love cats.
4. Being self employed.
5. Playing roller derby.

Life really is pretty awesome.


Food Journal:

Yesterday

breakfast 
2 eggs scrambled with green chili and cheese
2 slices bacon
1 cup fatty coffee.

Lunch- Still working on that roast chicken, Skin on 1/2 serving (4 small squares) of lillys dark chocolate (no sugar, stevia sweetened) 

Snack, Fatty chai

Dinner
1/2 cup sauerkraut (leftover from yesterday, Brats were cooked in it) , 6 uncured pepperoni slices(large) 1.5 oz Robusto cheese. 1/2 avocado

Calories: 1358 Carbs: 15 Fat: 117 Protein: 70 

I did much better on the protein !

March 12, 2014

FOODS	Calories	Carbs	Fat	Protein	Cholest	Sodium	Sugars	Fiber
Breakfast
Drinks - Black Coffee, 1 cup	2	0g	0g	0g	0mg	5mg	0g	0g
Fat - Coconut Oil, 20 g	172	0g	20g	0g	0mg	0mg	0g	0g
Kerry Gold - Grassfed Butter - Salted, 1 TBSP (14g)	100	0g	11g	0g	30mg	100mg	0g	0g
Organic Valley - Organic Heavy Whipping Cream, 3 tbsp	150	0g	18g	0g	60mg	15mg	0g	0g
Fresh - All Green Vegetable Juice, 3 oz	14	0g	0g	0g	0mg	0mg	0g	0g
Whole Foods - Organic Omega 3 Brown Egg, 2 egg	140	0g	9g	12g	430mg	130mg	0g	0g
Lunch
Whole Foods - Black Forest Bacon, 4 slices	160	2g	16g	8g	20mg	540mg	2g	0g
Earthbound Farms - Spring Mix, Organic Salad Greens, 1 cups, 3 oz (85g)	10	2g	0g	1g	0mg	48mg	1g	1g
Annie's Naturals - Organic Goddess Dressing, 2 Tbsp.	120	2g	12g	1g	0mg	320mg	0g	0g
Generic - Vine Ripe Tomato (Correct), 1 oz (91g)	5	1g	0g	0g	0mg	1mg	1g	0g
Oil - Olive, 2 tablespoon	239	0g	27g	0g	0mg	1mg	0g	0g
Snacks
Organic - Avocado, 0.5 avocado	150	2g	4g	1g	0mg	2mg	0g	2g
Generic Coffee - Black Coffee From Usda, 1 Cup	1	0g	0g	0g	0mg	5mg	0g	0g
Kerry Gold - Grassfed Butter - Salted, 1 TBSP (14g)	100	0g	11g	0g	30mg	100mg	0g	0g
Spectrum - Organic Virgin Coconut Oil, 28 g (1 tbsp)	240	0g	28g	0g	0mg	0mg	0g	0g
Cheese - Cheddar, 2 slice (1 oz)	226	1g	19g	14g	59mg	348mg	0g	0g
TOTAL:	1,829	10g	175g	37g	629mg	1,615mg	4g	3g

EXERCISES	Calories	Minutes	Sets	Reps	Weight
Cardiovascular
Skating, roller (rollerblading, roller blading)	1,486	120
TOTALS:	1,486	120	0	0	0

Fun Kettlebell Workout

I enjoyed this kettlebell workout today! I will be doing another video later and will post it if it is any good :) 

This guy talks about
"fatitiude" and "ripitude" and I thought that was pretty lame, but I enjoyed the workout. 

Take Care! 

♥Erica

Food and Exercise Journal entries

I had these written down, but did not get a chance to transpose until now...

••Saturday••

Breakfast: 2pc Whole foods black Forrest bacon, 3 eggs scrambled in bacon grease, Topped with green chili and organic grass-fed cheddar cheese

Snack/part of breakfast: Drank 2 cups of coffee, both with creamer,1tbsp coconut oil and 1/2 tbsp butter ... (spread out over about 3 hours until lunch)

Lunch: 28 oz green juice and slices of cheese

Snack: BIG plate of no-tortilla enchiladas Shredded chicken with grass fed cheddar cheese on top and green chili- also super easy to make.

It is 9pm and I am not hungry at all. I will not be eating more tonight.

♦exercise- very low intensity roller derby practice.

♥Ketone level: moderate

••Friday••

 Breakfast:
2 1/2 boiled omega-3 eggs, glass of green veggie juice (made from a very wide variety of veggies)

Snack/part of breakfast: Drank 2 cups of coffee with creamer and butter... (spread out over about 3 hours until lunch)

Friday Lunch: 2 eggs scrambled in butter sprinkled with organic cheese and a spring mix salad (about 2 cups topped with annies organic goddess dressing and organic cheese)

Friday Snack: (same as lunch)

Additional food: Drank an additional 28 oz of green juice.

Friday Dinner: 80/20 %  Grass fed hamburger... large-ish cooked rare, no bun, pickles, wrapped in romaine lettuce (not used to eating meat this way :/ )  salad  (about 2 cups topped with annies organic goddess dressing and organic cheese)

♦exercise- Rock Climbing with Adam and Autumn

••Thursday••

Thursday Lunch:
Lunch 3 scrambled eggs cooked in bacon grease with cheese sprinkled on it and a salad (spring mix annies organic goddess dressing, cheese)

Thursday dinner:
2 pc Whole Foods Black Forrest Bacon (only one carb for both slices! I was shocked)


♦exercise- 1 hour speed skating class at roller skate city

Thoughts on Nutrition

I have sort of derailed my journal because I am reading a book "Why We Get Fat", and my mind is blown. I am going to continue to record what I am eating, and the exercise I am doing, but from this point forward I will be doing things a little differently, and my goal will be to FINALLY eat enough and stop starving myself for the sake of conventional wisdom and a lifetime of misinformation in health and nutrition. I only have a little time to read (usually the evening before bed) so I am not finished reading it yet (although I have been listening to constant debates, webinars, podcasts, etc. about the theories in the book since I started it), and I am sure I will continue to be dumbfounded by the revelations but I just can't help wanting to talk about it NOW. I mentioned earlier that I would share my opinion on what an optimal human diet is after the past 5 years of independent recreational research I have put in to it. Since I had my first child, Autumn, I have been unable to lose weight, and not through lack of willpower, determination, or effort. Because of this I have been reading as much about nutrition, fitness and weight-loss as I have time for between my children and husband, my business and playing roller derby. I am so obsessed and fascinated with it that I occasionally daydream about becoming a nutritionist. Before reading this book, I felt that the best possible human diet consisted only of raw organic produce (as local as possible) and lean, grass-fed and free range meat (basically animals that eat the diet they are intended to eat) and the portion should be ¾ live food to ¼ lean protein. I enjoy being active and felt this was necessary to be fit and healthy. I thought grains of all kinds should be avoided all together and think that sugar and white flour are poison. I also thought that occasionally treating oneself to thinks like sugar and white bread was ok. “Everything in moderation” as we have been told so many times before. I have been eating a lean low calorie diet for the past 5 years and getting plenty of exercise so I know there is more to being overweight than eating less and exercising more, and I started this blog to prove to drs, nutritionists, etc that I was doing what conventional wisdom tells us to do to lose weight. I still think organic greens, and animals that eat their natural diet are great, and more than ever I think that refined sugar and white flour are poison, to the point that even though I have always loved these things, the idea of eating them is currently revolting. I will wait until I finish “Why We Get Fat” to explain the actual changes in what I think is an optimal human diet, what changed my mind, and how Gary Taubes put the nail in the coffin for me when it comes to refined sugar, and flour, and most carbohydrates. ♥ Erica

Dinner and snack posts, Exercise

My afternoon snack was green juice.

For dinner I had a salad fresh field greens, spicy shredded chicken, salsa, avocado, egg, carrot (no dressing) and one flour tortilla

I went to a speed skating class in the evening.

After the class I drank some juice and rolled up some chicken and lettuce in a tortilla for a post-workout snack.

Breakfast and Lunch

I am still feeling sick from last night. I ended up vomiting. I don't get migraines so I am not sure if that is what I had last night.

This morning I ate my two and a half eggs but skipped the juice until this afternoon. For lunch I had my plain Greek yogurt and fruit parfait and three more boiled eggs. I have been drinking my green juice this afternoon. I am still feeling sick.

Lunch and Dinner entries/ecercise

I was going to wait until the morning to put this in, but I was woken up by a headache on my left side accompanied by nausea.

For lunch I had some shredded chicken, and fruit mixed with unsweetened Greek yogurt. I had an apple in the afternoon.

I went to roller derby practice from 6:30-8:30 and I did not have time to eat dinner so took a big container of green juice with protein powder. I ate some cheese when I got home.

Breakfast This morning and Dinner from last night... And what I am reading now...

Dinner Last Night:
3 Tacos: Home made shredded chicken, Avocado, Salsa, Lots of Greens, Cheese, In a homemade blue corn tortilla shell.

Breakfast:
2 1/2 Boiled eggs, Fresh Green Veggie Juice, and in a little while I will have some coffee.


Last night I started reading "Why We Get Fat" which my brother read a few years ago and suggested.

Which you can buy here: 

http://www.amazon.com/Why-We-Get-Fat-About/dp/0307474259/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1392217967&sr=8-1&keywords=why+do+we+get+fat

I was planning to read a book Called "beyond paleo" that I bought a little while ago, but I couldn't find it. I bought this around the same time, and have not read it either. While I was looking for it, I realized that I have read A LOT of fitness and nutrition books in the last few years. From what I have read, it seems that vegan and vegetarian lifestyles are not really healthy (that it is possible to do it well if you are doing it for ethical reasons, but if you are doing it to be healthy there is no point) . I have only read the first chapter of this book, but it seems like that is where this book is going, Too. I think when I finish this book, I am going to go ahead and go out of my way to find a book that supports the health benefits of a vegan or vegetarian lifestyle. I feel like I have a decent grasp on nutrition (and  in a future post I will explain what I think is an ideal human diet from my current research). Realizing how one sides most of the books I have read are makes me think I may not know as much as I think. Honestly, what is and isn't healthy changes so much it is hard to know what to think. 

♥Erica

Snack Entry

Afternoon snack:
Fresh green juice (and tiny bit of protein powder)  and an apple.

What it's All About.

I saw a picture of myself that was taken this weekend, and it made me cry. Things just got REAL.

This is the picture:

I am the one in the dark green with the jeans. I know I am overweight, but I have not seen a picture of myself in a while. I usually feel like I am healthy, so it is easy to forget that I am also about 90 lbs overweight. 

This was me, right before I had kids, when I was in the best shape of my life:

I was hardly slight, at 5'2" and 145-ish pounds and a size 8, but barely recognizable to today's me. 

So, how did I get here? 

I gained all of my extra weight when I had my two children, the youngest is now 2 1/2. I gained 100 lbs with my first Daughter. It was stressful and terrifying. I asked the Gyno about it several times and she just said "You can just lose the extra weight after the baby is born"

After about 2 years of effort with no success, I had an emergency surgery to remove my gall bladder that had crystallized. Within about a month I lost 40 lbs and was finally starting to feel ok again. I decided to have another baby and got pregnant again about 6 months later. I had miscarriage, but in the 6 weeks I was pregnant I gained 60 lbs. Seriously, WTF. 

I told my new gyno, and he suggested going on a low glycemic diet when I got pregnant again a few months later. During that pregnancy I took the drs advice and I gained a normal amount, most of which came off during labor and the few months after, but now I still weigh around 235 lbs from the other pregnancies. 

Since penny was born I have:

•Read countless books on fitness, nutrition, and weight-loss

•Spent over a year working out 3 times a week with a trainer

•completely changed my diet, which now consists primary of lean protein and raw organic produce (including fresh green veggie juice 1-3 times a day) 

•exercised 3-6 days a week including both strength and cardio workouts

•Been tested for lots of things, including but not limited to diabetes and hypoglycemia 

•Started meditations and visualizations

•Lost 20 pounds over a year and a half

• Stopped playing roller derby (but still exercising) and gained 25 over 2 months (no, I am not pregnant) 

When I explain this people seem to imply that I am lying. Sometimes they do not say they think that but I can just tell that they question my efforts by brushing me off and saying "it's hard to lose weight". I lost weight many times before I had kids, and yes, it IS hard, but it has never been this hard. 

I feel like I have been consistent. I feel like I am healthier and happier than I have ever been, except that I am fat... REALLY fat. At this point sometimes I feel like I am fat enough that it is more important to get down to a healthy weight than to do it in a healthy way. After being told enough times that the scale does not lie, I think it is time to document my efforts. It will either ensure I am consistent, or it will (at least sort of) prove I am if I try talking to a doctor or nutritionist about it again. I am hard working, and I take good care of myself. I deserve to be fit and healthy, and I will succeed. 

What I want:

Honestly, at this point I would be satisfied if I got down to a muscular 160-170 lbs and THRILLED to be back to my pre-baby weight of 145. Since I am only 5'2" I really think I can do better than that. I think my ideal weight is 125-130 lbs. and a size 4-6. To get there I need to lose 100+ lbs (weighed in today at 135) and I am wearing a size 18, so I would need to lose 6-8 dress sizes. 

This is another derby skater, and has always been a motivating image and an ideal body: 

That photo is from ESPN and you can read more about the shoot here http://espn.go.com/espnw/body-issue/7053967/suzy-hotrod

At some point I want to be able to do a flag:

(image from recordsetter) 

But I don't even know where to start. 

I want to be able to do pull-ups, and chin ups, and not just one, but sets of them. 

I want to be the best roller derby player I know. 

I am have a degree in fashion design and i hate shopping for clothes. I want to enjoy buying clothes again. 

I want to feel confident in all things, and I want to love myself for the first time. Ever. 

I want to succeed beyond my wildest dreams and do things I have not even thought of yet. 

I want to be able to run for miles, and enjoy it. 

I want to be a positive role model for my children. 

I wan to feel comfortable in a swimsuit. 

I want to be inspirational to others. 

I want to stop hiding from the world. 

I want to be happy and healthy, and live this way for a very long time. 

I want to be the absolute BEST version of 

ME. 

♥ Erica